2.27.2010

Can't We All Just Get Along?



Conflicts. What’s the deal with them? We all know they are inevitable so why are we always surprised when they occur? Maybe we think we are immune because we are of the utmost moral integrity? Maybe we feel that we treat people how we want to be treated and that definitely couldn’t cause a conflict, right? Wrong.
I think a lot of conflicts between students have to deal with someone perceiving something to be one way when they really were (or weren’t) another. “She said I don’t know how to coordinate.” “She was looking at my boyfriend.” “He told me I was weak and didn’t deserve to have a girlfriend as pretty as mine.” “S/he said I was/looked/acted/sounded gay.” Why the conflict? Do you feel that you need to defend your sexual preference? Are you struggling in that area? Did the person call you out on something that you already knew was the truth? Come on!
I used to hate it when my older sister would want to have a talk with me. These talks always circled around the idea of why I had no friends. Basically, when it came down to it: I was just too darn mean! There really isn’t a nice way to tell someone that they are mean and unpleasant to be around- if you think about it. So those discussions would always end with me in tears and vowing to “never talk to her again.” But the hard part was that she was right.
So, why all the drama?! I don’t think it is hard to have a peaceable talk with the people with whom we are in a conflict with. But one of the people, or groups, in the situation has to be able to be mature enough to respectfully engage in a non-confrontational discussion. The key word: RESPECTFUL. In most every aspect of society, we have to give respect in order to receive it in return.
In the words of Rodney King, “Can’t we all just get along?”

2 comments:

  1. That is so true! I really can never wrap my head around the whole concept of people not liking each other or always having these major conflicts with other people. My sister is this way. She is married now so she doesn’t exactly have to have the greatest of friends anymore but she has never had a group of close friends or people she actually hasn’t gotten into a fight with. She is constantly ruining friendships and relationships. So I guess that is why I really related to your post. It would be so much easier if everyone could get along. If you don’t relate to someone or necessarily agree then respect him or her at the least. We are all on the same page in the end. In a way it’s just the judgments thrown around by everyone trying one up the person next to them. So yeah just one big competition. The world is definitely changing in that sense. People have stopped wanting to help others or make it a better place I feel like. It’s all getting so selfish. Even when people do something great it is for all the wrong reasons. Obviously that’s not every case, but the type of people and conflicts your talking about. It is like what everyone always says, you see your faults in other people and judge them for it. If you are insecure you’re going to take it out on other people. As sad as it sounds you’re right on, let’s all just get along and respect one another. I totally agree.

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  2. I agree that we judge people for the faults that we have. Not sure why. Maybe because it's easier to point the finger? And then there's that saying about when you point one finger...(sigh)

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